Diana Prince, Secret Identity
by Galaxy1001D
Summary: DC Animated Universe. When Wonder Woman's dating life hits rock bottom, the Flash suggests that she assume a secret identity. Rated 'T' for multiple references to Diana's chest. The humor is too sophomoric to be rated 'Mature'.
1. Chapter 1

**Diana Prince, Secret Identity**

_By Galaxy1001D_

High above the earth was a massive orbiting satellite. It wasn't just a satellite; it was the Justice League Watchtower, the global headquarters of the Earth's mightiest group of superheroes, the Justice League!

In the cafeteria, a tall statuesque brunette amazon sat next to a carrot topped heroine whose costume featured giant bird wings. Amazon was an apt description of her, for she was Princess Diana of , better known to the world as Wonder Woman!

"I just don't understand it Shayera," Diana sighed. "I know he cares about me. Why won't he admit it?"

"Look Diana, you came from a society without any men and maybe you should be grateful," Shayera suggested. "If there's one woman in the galaxy who doesn't need a man to make herself complete it's you. Don't let him get to you, okay?"

"Okay," Diana slumped against the table and stared at her coffee mug.

With a toss of her auburn hair, Shayera rose from the table. "Look, I gotta relieve J'onn right now but in the meantime you hang in there. See you."

"See you," Diana mumbled as the heroine known the world as Hawkgirl left. She brushed her beautiful black tresses out of her face and tried not to cry.

Suddenly, faster than the eye could follow a young man in a red costume appeared. "Hey there, Diana!"

"Not now Flash," Diana grumbled. "I'm not in the mood."

"What's eatin' you?" he asked as he sat down with his plate of hamburgers. "Bat's got your tongue?"

"Keep it up and not only will you be able to run as fast as Superman, you'll be able to fly as fast as him too," Diana muttered darkly.

"I see hanging out with the Dark Knight has rubbed off on you," he nodded. "So what's wrong?"

She sat up and leaned against the table. "Flash, do you find me attractive?"

The fastest man alive's heartbeat managed to go faster than the speed of sound. "Heck yes!" he smiled. "You're probably the most beautiful woman alive! I'd be honored if…"

"Then why doesn't Batman think so?"

The Flash's sunny disposition faltered, but just for a moment. Even superpowers couldn't make someone a hero if he couldn't roll with the punches after all. "Batman? He doesn't think you're attractive? What makes you think he doesn't?"

"He doesn't think we should see each other," she sighed.

"Ah." Flash made a big show of nodding sagely, but even his mask couldn't hide his youth and inexperience. "Man trouble. Got it. And you want a man's perspective on the problem is that it?"

"What's the matter with me?" Wonder Woman asked pointblank, her magnificent bosom heaving in her patriotic one piece swimsuit style costume. "Why doesn't he find me attractive? Am I too tall or something?"

"I could get around that," the Flash smirked.

"Too strong?" Diana guessed. "I heard men don't feel comfortable with women who are physically stronger than they are," she continued. "It hurts their masculinity or something like that."

"Normally I'd say yes, but this is Batman we're talking about here," Flash smiled. "The guy's the ultimate danger junkie."

"Is it because he doesn't have any superpowers?" Diana guessed.

"No superpowers?" Flash repeated in disbelief. "Did you see what happened on that last mission we were on? How can anyone believe that Batman doesn't have superpowers?"

"Is it because I'm a princess?"

"Yes!" Flash snapped his fingers. "That's it!"

"What's it?"

"You're Princess Diana of Themyscira," Flash told her. "Don't you see? You're a celebrity. Everybody knows who you are."

"And?"

"Batman's the Dark Knight," Flash continued. "_Nobody_ knows who he is. Let's just say the paparazzi saw Wonder Woman and Batman kissing. What would the world say?"

"That Wonder Woman and Batman are in love," Diana shrugged. "So?"

"Now let's say the paparazzi saw Princess Diana of Themyscira on a date with Bruce Wayne," the Flash countered. "What would the world say?"

Diana frowned in thought before her eyes widened in realization. "That Batman must be Bruce Wayne! Oh how could I have missed that?"

"You're an honest person," Flash shrugged. "You never bothered with a secret identity, but you should probably give it a try. That way you can have a life that's almost normal and not have to worry about being mobbed or attacked all the time."

"But it's too late isn't it?" Diana sighed. "I never made my identity a secret. I don't even wear a mask."

"It's never too late," Flash assured her. "Let's talk to the master of hiding in plain sight."

_Fifteen minutes later…_

"You want me to what?" Superman asked. Clark Kent, aka Superman, the Man of Steel was uncomfortable with the idea.

"Just share some tips on being a mild mannered reporter," Flash shrugged. "You know, show her how you maintain your secret identity."

"I don't know about this Wally," Superman rubbed the back of his neck and looked away.

Flash looked in Diana's direction and mouthed "Do it," without making a sound.

Diana looked back at Flash with a frightened expression and shook her head.

Flash nodded with as serious a look on his face as he could muster.

Diana gave a heaving sigh that nearly caused the Flash to lose his footing and then made a cute but sad face at the Man of Steel. "Pwease…?" she lisped as she pouted her lips.

"Oh okay," Superman blushed.

Flash winked. No one could resist Wonder Woman's 'Pretty Please' face. He felt kind of bad about letting her know she could do it though. It was kind of like handing over nuclear technology to a nation with unknown intentions. The ability to look cute combined with Diana's beauty and superpowers could be too much power for anyone to handle responsibly.

"Okay, welcome to Superman's class on secret identities," Superman cleared his throat. "Let's start with your public 'hero' identity. Wonder Woman." The Man of Steel stood heroically with his shoulders back and his feet wide apart. "Go ahead stand like a superhero."

Wonder Woman mimicked his pose. Her tall athletic figure seemed to ooze with grace, strength, defiance, and beauty.

"Never stand like that when assuming your secret identity," Superman told her.

"What?" the princess asked.

"It all starts with your posture," Superman told her. "As heroes we tend to stand heroically. We can't do that when we're trying to pass as normal. We look too much like superheroes. The first thing you've got to learn is how to slump."

"Slump?" Diana repeated doubtfully. "Is this some kind of joke or something?"

"Diana, you're a beautiful woman, people notice you," Superman shrugged apologetically. "Somehow you've got to make people ignore you. That means letting go of the poise and beauty that tells everyone you're a princess."

"What do _you _do?" Diana sighed.

"I usually pretend I'm afraid," Superman shrugged. "Afraid of rejection, afraid of losing my job, afraid of being hit by a car… To the average man on the street the list of things to be afraid of is endless."

"_I_ am Princess Diana of Themyscira!" Wonder Woman put her hands on her hips and stood heroically. "_I_ am _not_ a coward!"

"That's the point," Flash said. "The whole point is to stop being Princess Diana of Themyscira and just be Jane Average, normal citizen."

"I couldn't possibly call the normal man on the street a coward," Superman rolled his eyes. "When you think of the number of things that can hurt him it's amazing he even leaves the house in the morning!"

"You got a point," Flash said. "Just think about all those policemen and firemen. They rush into danger with _no_ superpowers! They gotta be the bravest men in the world!"

"What about Batman?" Superman asked.

"What?" Flash shrugged. "You _still_ gonna tell me that Batman doesn't have any superpowers? Compared to _you_ maybe, but compared to the rest of us he's… Batman!"

"Could we get back to _my_ problem please?" Diana asked rather testily.

"Oops," Superman smiled bashfully. "Sorry Diana. I'll try to stay on topic. Okay, I'll go change into my civilian clothes and take you through my method step by step."

Soon the Man of Steel was dressed as Clark Kent, mild manned reporter. Diana had to admit that he certainly looked different.

"Okay, let's go down the checklist," Clark said. "First of all, you'll notice that my voice lacks the tone of authority that I normally put on as Superman. Next, you can see that the suit and tie I'm wearing changes the shape of my body. My posture is different, making my entire body look different. My hair is parted differently. You don't see that 'Elvis' curl I normally sport as Superman. As Clark Kent I comb my hair back…"

"Whose idea was the 'Elvis' curl?" Flash interrupted.

"My parents," Clark sighed. "Even after four decades, you just can't beat the King. Okay, now for the pièce de résistance." He took off his eyeglasses and showed them to Diana. "You'll notice that the distortion they cause really changes the appearance of my eyes. You might say that my glasses are my mask."

Diana examined his large coke bottle eyeglasses. "How do you see in these things?"

"One of the benefits of super vision," Clark smiled. "I can see normally and I don't even have to worry about eyestrain. As long as I get enough energy from a yellow sun I'm golden."

She handed the spectacles back to him. "Not all of us have super vision Clark."

"True, but as a woman you have options men don't have," Clark pointed out as he put his glasses back on. "Women can change their makeup, their clothing styles, even the style and color of their hair. Let's face it. A woman can look a lot different than a man can just by what she puts on in the morning."

"I hear that Black Canary puts on a wig," Flash added.

"You've heard?" Diana asked. "Don't you know?"

"Hey it's not a good idea to ask a woman if she's wearing a wig."

"My cousin Kara wears a wig when she assumes her secret identity," Clark offered. "If she can do it, why not you?"

"And what happens if the wig comes off for some reason?" Diana asked. "People will want to know why I'm disguising myself."

"I don't know, because blondes have more fun?" Flash suggested.

"Um, I just thought of something," Clark blushed. Flash was impressed by his 'shy bookworm' demeanor. It was incredibly realistic. "There's no polite way to tell you this. If you really want to disguise yourself you're going to have to do something about your um… physical assets."

"Physical assets?" Diana asked in a dangerous voice. "My _what_, specifically?"

Flash and Clark both took a step backwards simultaneously.

"Wow, that's some impressive normal-man-on-the-street style fear," Flash smiled nervously. "You really looked afraid just then!"

"I know, didn't I?" Clark blushed. "When I'm dressed as a normal guy, it just comes naturally. That's right, Wally. I wanted it to look _just that way_."

"Hey! What about _my_ problem?" Diana barked. "What physical assets am I going to have to change?"

"Uh, well," Clark stole a glance at her chest.

"Your bosoms, your rack, your magnificent set of cleavage," Flash babbled. "Your mammary glands, your milk jugs, your fantastic, perfect, all you can eat melons! What he's trying to say is that if there's one thing that every man is going to notice about you it's your boobies!"

Clark took another step backwards and Flash moved faster than the eye could follow. It was as if he teleported to the farthest end of the room from Diana. The look on Diana's face showed that that was a smart move too.

"What about my boo—my chest?" Diana snarled. "What's wrong with it?"

"Nothing!" Clark smiled nervously. "It's every man's fantasy!"

"It certainly is _my_ fantasy, and I'm not ashamed to admit it!" Flash smirked. "Superman's right, Diana. Your chest is the ideal that all women aspire to. You've got to change the support or something to change the way they ride or people will be comparing you to Wonder Woman all the time."

"Come on you guys! I'm not Power Girl!" Diana protested. "You've got to be kidding me!"

"I'm afraid we're not," Clark sighed. "Look at me in this suit. It's too big for me and it hides the shape of my body."

"It makes you look fat," Diana sniped.

"It's supposed to," Clark nodded. "My Superman outfit shows off nearly every crack and groove of my body. If everybody thinks that Clark is some big fat guy they'll never make the connection."

"I don't believe this!" Diana shook her head. "What you're basically saying is in order to blend in I have to give up my self-respect?"

"I'm saying that in order to blend in you have to give up your pride," Clark shrugged. "That's how _I _do it. But hey, if you got a better idea, more power to you."

Somehow Wonder Woman was able to both stand heroically and wear a perfect damsel-in-distress expression on her face at the same time. "I'm going to hate this," she groaned.


	2. Chapter 2

**Diana Prince, Secret Identity part two**

_By Galaxy1001D_

High above the earth the Justice League Watchtower stood sentinel over the planet Earth and the human race. Inside were the most powerful heroes ever collected, everyone alert and poised to respond to the first sign of trouble.

Well, not _every _hero. Some of them were messing around with personal issues.

"Okay let's work on the walk," Superman said. He was back in his superhero suit for he was uncomfortable wearing his civilian clothes at the Watchtower.

Wonder Woman stood at attention like a professional soldier.

"Okay, slump," the Man of Steel instructed. "Slouch. Hunch your shoulders and cower a bit. Let go of your pride." When the amazing amazon complied, Superman continued. "Now walk."

Wonder Woman stood up straight and confidently strode forward like she owned the world.

"No, no, not like that," Superman shook his head. "Keep slouching. You're not Princess Diana of Themyscira, you're nobody!" he scolded as he walked beside her. "You're weak! You're worried! You're frightened! The world is a threatening place and the only thing you can do about it is hide! You're a woman; that makes you a victim!"

To her credit, Wonder Woman valiantly tried to shuffle along like she was a hunchbacked assistant in a Frankenstein film as the Man of Steel continued to berate her.

"You're ashamed of yourself!" Superman shouted. "You're nobody! When challenges come your way you back down! In a crisis, you hit the deck and it's every gal for herself! When you're threatened you call for help! If you see a mouse you get on top of a chair! Don't look at me when I'm talking to you! You're afraid of me, because I'm a man and you're a woman! Never forget that!"

"Yeeargh!" Diana seized the Man of Steel by the arm and hurled him through a wall. Fortunately it was an interior wall or there would have been a hull breach.

"Too much?" Clark Kent's meek voice asked through the Superman-shaped hole.

"Oh, do you think?" Diana replied sarcastically.

Twenty minutes later, Wonder Woman was ready to throw another hero through a wall. She stifled that urge because not all of them were as indestructible as Superman.

"Welcome to the superhero secret identity makeover!" Flash announced with a playful smile.

"I'm going to regret this," Wonder Woman grumbled as she sat on a barstool.

"In the dressing room back there are a number of outfits in your size," the scarlet speedster announced. "Put them on we'll see how it goes. Afterwards I'll do your makeup."

"Wait, what?" Wonder Woman gulped.

"Go on, go!" Flash implored her as he shooed her into the dressing room. "Unless you want me to dress you super-fast," he winked.

Diana's icy blue eyes were even icier. "Don't even think about it," she warned him.

"Little late for that," he teased. When she disappeared into the dressing room he called in after her. "The outfits are arranged into sets! Just put them on one by one and don't worry about mixing and matching until you've tried them all."

When Diana came out of the dressing room Flash addressed an imaginary audience. "Ladies and gentlemen, I am pleased to announce our secret identity collection. Princess Diana is currently modeling a look I call the 'shy librarian'. Note the way the baggy clothing tends to cover her up. Skirt supplied by Witch Hazel. Stockings by Wednesday Addams. Jacket and blouse by my fourth grade teacher, Mrs. Farafowler. Sports bra by the planet Krypton, 'cause it's gonna take something out of this world to contain _those_ two puppies!"

"One more remark about my puppies and your dogs will be barkin'" Diana warned him.

"Sit down and I'll do the finishing touches," the scarlet speedster instructed. When she complied, his hands were too fast for the eye to follow. "Notice the way the hair is pulled back into a severe unflattering bun!" he announced when he was finished less than a second later. "The horn-rimmed glasses brought to you by our friends at the Benjamin Franklin fan club draw the eye and obscure the face. Lipstick too pale for a brunette appears to thin the lips. A darkening of the laugh lines makes you look ten years older and some worry lines have been added for color!" He handed the altered amazon a hand mirror. "Take a look. What do you think?"

From behind the ugly spectacles, Diana's beautiful blue eyes widened in horror. She opened her mouth and let out an ear splitting scream.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present the second in our secret identity line up," the Flash announced ten minutes later. When Diana stomped sullenly out he continued. "I call this ensemble 'the blonde bimbo', perfect for that tall Nordic beauty. Note the poofy wig that screams bleached blonde. The corset worn under the low cut top makes the chest jump out and say 'hello' ensuring that no one will remember your face. Fishnet stockings go up to the miniskirt that comes from the red light district. Stiletto heels force the legs and body into a painful position that is guaranteed to alter your walk and make you pleasing to the eye. Our oversized purse ensures that you're never very far away from your super suit or your magic lasso yet is still tacky enough to look cheap! With the right lipstick, mascara and eye shadow, nothing says, 'I'm easy' like 'the blonde bimbo' look."

"I look like Black Canary with a boob job," Diana grumbled. "You got this stuff from her, didn't you? Does she know what you're doing?"

"It will be back before she knows it's missing," Flash assured her.

"No wonder it's so tight," Diana muttered. "You gave me a corset that's two sizes too small. Flash, I am _not_ going out into public dressed like _this_. I can't breathe for starters."

"Come on, Diana, take a deep breath," the Flash encouraged her. "See how it feels."

Against her better judgment Diana inhaled deeply…

"Eek!" she screamed when the corset split open. She clutched at her exposed chest to keep the fastest man alive from getting more than the fast peep in history. "Flash! I'll get you for this!" she growled as she covered herself with one hand and punched at the scarlet speedster with the other.

"You'll have to catch me first!" he laughed as he dodged her blows. Clobbering the fastest man alive was a real challenge. "I had no idea that would happen! I swear! I guess you really _are_ the most powerful woman on Earth! Ordinary fabric doesn't have a chance against _those_ wonder melons!"

"Darn it!" Diana growled. "There's no way I can get ahold of you fighting with one hand like this! Tell me Flash, how do you survive tripping and falling at your speed? I'm surprised you're not dead by now."

"Oh my body is highly resistant to blunt force trauma," the Flash replied while admiring the embarrassed amazon. "I guess I'm kind of immune to speed. Lethal impacts don't seem to bother me that much and when I do get hurt I seem to heal super-fast. Why do you ask?"

"Just checking," Diana said before she punched him in the chin and sent him rolling head over heels out the door. "I didn't want to maim or kill you."

"Totally worth it," Flash moaned weakly.

Incredibly, the Flash had recovered by the time Diana had changed back into her Wonder Woman outfit. "Hey Diana," he said as he appeared behind her.

"Yee-ahh!" she screamed before she turned around with a roundhouse punch.

"Whoa!" Flash cried as he dodged out of the way. "Easy Diana!"

"Don't startle me like that!" Princess Diana of Themyscira gasped.

"Sorry about that; how _should_ I startle you?" the Flash quipped.

"What?" the embarrassed princess snapped. "What do you want? Haven't I slapped you around enough for one day?"

"I'm still working on your problem," Flash smiled disarmingly. "If you want to be like everybody else you're going to have to get a job."

That stopped Diana cold. "A job? You mean like an occupation?"

"Sure you can't just spend Themyscira's money or give lectures about the ancient world," the Flash informed her. "You're going to have work for a living like the rest of us."

"Superman doesn't have a job," Diana insisted.

"Mild mannered reporter for a major metropolitan newspaper remember?" the Flash reminded her.

"Oh yeah, that's right," Wonder Woman sighed. "So what do you suggest?"

"Well, until we can get your new identity a background, it can't be anything that requires a lot of education," the Flash informed her, "and you also have to be able to disappear for hours at a time without arousing suspicion."

"What kind of jobs work like that?" she wondered.

"Well, you _could_ be a waitress," he suggested.

"Customer service?" Her icy blue eyes became even icier. "Seriously? The best you can come up with is minimum wage? Forget it Flash, I'm leaving." With those words she turned on her heel and strode defiantly out of the changing room.

"Hey!" Flash snapped his fingers. "That's it!"

"What's it?" she asked as she looked behind her.

"We've been going about this all wrong!" the Flash grinned. "I've got an occupation for you that you could master after five minutes of training! One that doesn't require you to seriously alter your appearance. One that can let you well… be you!"

"Like what?"

"Diana, what women are tall, beautiful, and look like superheroes?"

"Amazons?"

"Supermodels," the Flash smiled and shook his head. "Think about it. You've got poise, style, grace and the looks for it."

"Most of those walking coat hangers are a lot skinnier than me," she said.

"You're perfect!" Flash smiled. "You walk like a supermodel anyway! That job requires a lot of costume changes. It would be perfect training for changing out of your civilian clothes into your Wonder Woman outfit during an emergency! All you have to do is walk down the runway and get your picture taken. Come on, I could train you for it in less than five minutes."

"_You_ could train me to be a supermodel," Diana put her hands on her hips and raised a doubtful eyebrow. "_Right_. Okay Flash. I've got five minutes. What do I have to do?"

"Okay," he said with as serious a face as he could muster, "clear your head. We're going to do a little memory exercise. Do you remember back when you a young teenager and you first saw your boobs?"

"What is this obsession you men have with my boobs?" Diana snarled.

"I'm serious Diana!" Flash insisted. "Let go of your present self and take yourself back. Stop being the adult you and remember. What was your reaction when you first saw your boobs?"

Diana looked down and pulled the top of her swimsuit style outfit open to glance down at her chest. She looked back at the Flash with an embarrassed and worried look on her face.

"Okay," Flash nodded. "Now take yourself back to the first time you found out how much fun they could be."

Diana examined her chest again before looking at the Flash and smiling mischievously.

"Good!" Flash made a framing gesture. "But don't smile! The photographers don't like it when you smile! Now keep that feeling of how fun your boobs are but don't smile."

Diana glanced down at her chest and then stared at Flash with an intense look of restrained emotion.

"Perfect!" Flash cheered. "Okay, the next thing you gotta know about supermodels is that in the magazines they always seem _sleepy_ and _paranoid_." The scarlet speedster demonstrated by squinting and tiptoeing in an exaggerated manner while painfully arching his back. He turned his back on Diana before pivoting his torso to look at her. "They're always lounging around like they don't have any energy and they're always looking behind them!"

Diana squinted and did her best to walk like an exhausted ninja.

"Great! Keep doing that," the Flash instructed. "Okay, picture this: You're in the jungle, and you're all alone. You've been walking for hours, but you can't let your guard down for a moment!"

Diana squinted, tiptoed around, and listened intently to the imaginary jungle sounds.

"Good, that's very Catwoman!" Flash smiled. "And speaking of Catwoman, you think you hear something!"

Diana put her hand to her ear and pivoted her torso without moving her legs the way Flash did earlier.

"It's a tiger!" Flash gasped. "What do you do?"

Diana assumed an alert fighting stance and swung her magic lasso.

"No-no!" Flash scolded. "You're an ordinary woman remember? You don't have the strength of an indestructible amazon! You see a tiger! What do you do?"

Diana put her hands out in a halting gesture while pursing her pouty lips and widening her eyes in fear.

"Good! Now run away!" Flash ordered. "Only you can't run 'cause you're wearing high heels! You'll have to run like this: In a really girly run!" The scarlet speedster demonstrated by prancing around like Captain Jack Sparrow. "Girly run! Girly run Diana!" he commanded as Wonder Woman pranced around with her hands flailing helplessly.

"Okay, the tiger's got you cornered!" Flash continued as Diana stared at the imaginary tiger with pouty lips and bulging eyes. "It looks like it's curtains, and that's when you look down, and see… your boobs!"

Diana examined herself and stared at the imaginary tiger with a huge breathless smile.

"Bravo, Diana!" the Flash applauded. "You're a natural! You'll probably be on the cover of every magazine by Christmas!"

"Wait a second," Diana frowned. "I'm already on the cover of every magazine! That's why Batman won't go out with me, because I'm too famous!"

Flash's smile vanished. "What? Oh! Oh yeah…"

"People are bound to notice that the super model looks just like Wonder Woman no matter how I change my name or how many wigs I wear," Diana grumbled.

"Yeah, right," Flash stammered. "I just thought that if you were standing in a group of super models, you wouldn't stand out."

"And I _wouldn't_ stand out," Diana shook her head sadly, "at least not until my picture was taken and put into a calendar. Then everybody would have an entire month to notice how much I look like Wonder Woman. Sorry Flash. It was a good idea, but it's just not going to work."

"Oh um yeah," Flash stroked his chin. "I guess we'll have to think of something else."


	3. Chapter 3

**Diana Prince, Secret Identity part three**

_By Galaxy1001D_

Floating through space, the Justice League Watchtower orbited the planet Earth. In the monitoring room was a coffee colored man with a military buzzcut was wearing a green and black uniform that was recognized throughout the galaxy as the uniform of the Green Lantern Corps. His eyes glowed an eerie green, but his appearance was pedestrian compared to the man sitting next to him. To his right was a green skinned alien wearing a blue cape, blue briefs, blue boots a red belt with a gold buckle and two baldrics that attached to the cape at two large gold buttons at the shoulders.

"Quiet night," Jon Stewart, the Green Lantern muttered.

"Yes," J'onn J'onzz, the Martian Manhunter agreed.

Meanwhile elsewhere on the station, Wonder Woman and the Flash were still trying to find a civilian cover for the amazon princess.

"Let's see," the Flash stroked his chin. "If being a supermodel's out, you could always masquerade as the model's poor cousin: A dancer. With your grace and agility, you should be a natural."

"A dancer?" Wonder Woman put her hands on her hips and raised a skeptical eyebrow. "What kind of dancer, a Broadway dancer?"

"Or you could be an exotic dancer," the Flash teased.

"I'm already exotic," Wonder Woman sighed. "I'm Princess Diana of Themyscira, I'm exotic enough as it is! I thought the idea was for me to be more ordinary."

"No, Diana, I mean a stripper!" Flash explained impatiently.

Back in the monitor room, the Martian Manhunter sat up in his chair. "One of our friends is in danger," he announced seriously. "His life hangs in the balance."

"In danger? Who is it?" Green Lantern asked as he sprang from his chair, ready for action. "Quickly J'onn! Who is it where are they?"

"Flash has just told Diana that she would be a perfect stripper," the Martian said with a straight face.

"Hell," Jon Stewart grunted as he sat back down and adjusted the sensors. "I can't save that idiot from his own stupidity."

"Agreed," J'onn J'onzz said as he relaxed in his chair and resumed scanning the Earth for trouble.

"Whoa!" the Flash cried as he rolled through the archway leading into the monitoring room. "Diana can really throw!"

"Flash, please don't tell me that you're stupid enough to tell Diana to her face that she would be a perfect stripper," Jon Stewart groaned. "The rest of us depend on you to watch our back. If you really _are_ that stupid I'll throw you out the airlock myself."

"I was looking for something that nobody in the world would suspect Wonder Woman would ever do!" Flash insisted. "Admit it: Diana would never do that in a million years! That's why nobody would suspect that Princess Heat is really Wonder Woman!"

"Princess Heat?" J'onn asked.

"Diana's stage name," the Flash smiled as he got up and brushed himself off. "She's a princess, and she's _hot_."

"If the stripper is supposed to be a cover identity, there's no way you can call her a princess," Jon Stewart shook his head.

"Okay, how about 'Temptress'?" Flash grinned.

"It seems beneath her," the Martian Manhunter said coldly.

"Temptress," Green Lantern shook his head. "Man, you really _are_ stupid aren't you? You're lucky you're the fastest man alive, but the Watchtower has only so many places to hide."

"Why does she need a cover identity anyhow?" J'onn J'onzz asked.

"Yeah is this some kind of undercover work?" Jon Stewart added. "Drugs or some kind of human trafficking ring? Is Diana going to need backup or anything?"

"Oh it's nothing like that," Flash chuckled. "She just wants to pass as a normal woman, that's all."

"_That's _your idea of a normal woman?" Green Lantern asked. "You are _so_ damaged."

"A normal woman who looks like Diana," Flash shrugged. "She stands out. I just thought of a cover where no one will be able to remember her face. She should be thanking me."

"Man!" Green Lantern shook his head in disgust. "When they were handin' out the brains, you thought they meant trains, and you said 'no thanks, I'm the Flash and I don't need one.'"

"When did this happen?" the Martian Manhunter asked. "Who was doing this? For what purpose did they distribute brains?"

"Flash, you better not be talking about me," Wonder Woman scolded when she marched into the monitoring room. She pinched his ear through his crimson cowl and turned and walked back out again.

"Ow, ow, ow, ow," Flash grimaced as he was forced to follow her out of the monitoring room.

"Man, the big dummy's probably a male stripper himself," Jon Stewart grunted. "He doesn't have enough brain cells to do anything different."

"Actually, he's a forensic scientist," the Martian Manhunter announced.

Green Lantern monitored the sensors for almost thirty seconds before turning his head in J'onn J'onzz's direction. "What? Seriously?"

He couldn't hear J'onn's retort because the deafening screeching noise of an angry woman was too loud for conversation.

In another room in the Watchtower, a masked broad-shouldered man wearing a bat eared cowl and a scalloped cape over a grey unitard entered to break up the fight. Long black gloves decorated with three fins along the exterior arms covered his hands and forearms. A matching set of briefs was under a thick yellow leather belt with military style pouches. His boots were the same onyx color of his gloves as were the dark briefs that fit over the tightfitting grey bodysuit. On the chest was the silhouette of a bat, its wings spread wide. The cowl was a full face mask, exposing only the eyes, mouth, and chin. The bottom of the nose was exposed allowing the man to breathe. "Shayera!" the Dark Knight shouted. "How many times have I told you to control your temper?" he paused to frown at Wonder Woman and the Flash. "Diana? This is new. I think you can let him down now."

Diana was holding the scarlet speedster in the air with one hand by grabbing the top of his head and squeezing. "Oh! Batman!" she blushed as she let go of the Flash. "I didn't know you were in the Watchtower."

"I just came up to do some research," the Batman replied. He looked at the Flash who was clutching his head and stumbling around as if intoxicated. "You okay?"

"What?" the Flash shook his head. "Sure! Nothing I haven't taken before!"

Batman's eyes narrowed. "Listen you two, if I've said it once, I've said it a hundred times, if the Justice League is going to last we have to learn to get along. Leave the infighting to the villains. Do I make myself clear?"

Flash stood at attention. "Oh yes sir! Yes sir!"

The Dark Knight looked at the amazon princess. "Diana?"

"But! He said! He said!" the princess stammered.

"_Diana_?" the Batman repeated dangerously.

"Fine," Wonder Woman snarled as she hugged herself and looked away.

When Batman leaned in closer she stood at attention just like the Flash did. Batman allowed himself a small smirk before he walked away.

The Flash let out a breath and leaned against the wall. "Still don't think he has superpowers?" he snorted. "You're strong enough to break him in half and he still made you jump to attention."

"I didn't jump to attention!" Wonder Woman protested. "Besides you did the same thing!"

"I'm the fastest man alive, not the stupidest," Flash smiled. "Hey, you're shivering. You're turned on aren't you?"

"Flash do you want the word 'alive' to be removed from the 'fastest man' part?" Diana snarled.

"I get it now," the Flash smiled mischievously. "You like the bad boys don't you? You're not used to be frightened or dominated by anyone! It's thrilling. It's exciting. It turns you on, doesn't it? The only problem is that the only people who can do that to you are suave, hideously evil villains that have to be stopped at any cost. If only someone could do that to you who was a _good_ guy… Enter the Dark Knight, with all the cool of a villain and all the admirable qualities of a hero! Instead of a guy you love to hate he's the guy you hate to love. Heck, if I were a woman, I'd be after him myself!"

"Shut up Flash!" Diana lunged for him, but the fastest man alive was too quick for her. "Don't try to get inside my head! Just don't!"

"Hey, I need to get inside your head if I'm going to find a secret identity that fits," he protested. "I want my next suggestion to be a good one you know. Some of the things I've suggested have got me bruises."

"Then wise up and quit while you're ahead," Diana threw up her hands in surrender. "The secret identity idea was stupid. There's no way I can pull it off. I've got too much self-respect. Forget about it; It's over."

"Fine," Flash shrugged as Wonder Woman walked away. "Forget about spending time with the man you love. I'm sure that Batgirl and Catwoman will be more than happy to keep him company in the meantime. They've _got_ secret identities. I'm sure Catwoman has another identity by now. Fine. Forget about it. It was a stupid idea anyway."

Diana sighed as she leaned her head against a doorframe. "Almost made it," she whispered. She turned and looked back at the scarlet speedster. "Fine. What do you suggest?"

"Do exactly what Superman told you: _Let go of your pride_ Diana," Flash said as seriously as he could. "Look, the reason I've been yanking your chain is because you need to loosen up and let go of your pride. You're a princess. Disguising yourself as one of the common folk isn't going to change that. I know that. Batman knows that. The only one who doesn't know it is you."

Diana bit her bottom lip and slumped in defeat.

"Look, the problem is that most women change their appearance to try to look like Wonder Woman; _you've_ got to do the exact opposite," Flash smiled disarmingly. "I know it's not easy; even the girls from Themyscira aren't wired to do it that way, but you've got to try."

"Why do _I_ have to be the one to humble myself?" Wonder Woman demanded. "Bruce Wayne is rich and powerful! Why do I have to be the one to lower myself? Can't we be on equal footing?"

"You could, if everybody didn't know that Princess Diana was Wonder Woman," Flash shrugged apologetically. "Look, I never said it was fair."

Back in the monitoring room Green Lantern cocked his head in alarm. "Listen," Jon Stewart hissed. "Do you hear that knocking? It's like something is trying to get into the Watchtower!"

"Diana is experiencing frustration," the Martian Manhunter explained.

Back in the other room, the Flash came up behind Wonder Woman and grabbed her by the shoulders. "Hey! Hey!" he said in alarm. "I know I asked you to ugly yourself up, but don't wreck your perfect face by bashing your head against the wall! You still have to be Wonder Woman too, y'know!"

To be a superhero one has to have a strong sense of justice. That was why Flash smiled at all the physical abuse he was taking. He knew he asked for it. He also knew that Wonder Woman could punish him even worse and right now she was doing it.

"F-flash?" the amazon princess sniffed as tears trickled out of her beautiful blue eyes. "I can't win, can I? I promised my mother that I wouldn't disgrace our people, and now I have to! I-I promised her!" Overcome with shame and grief, Diana sobbed into her hands and knelt on the floor.

"What? No! No!" Flash gasped in horror. Anyone with the slightest trace of goodness and humanity would be moved to tears by the sight of a woman as beautiful as Wonder Woman weeping, and Flash had enough goodness and humanity to be a superhero! As a matter of fact, he _was_ a superhero! So his alarm at seeing the indestructible amazon crying was understandable. "Don't cry! It could be fun! Here's your chance to do something different! Your chance to be somebody else for a change!" Yeah right, what woman in their right mind wouldn't want to be a gorgeous Disney princess who's as strong as Superman? "It's going to be all right, Diana! It's going to be all right! We just need to find another option, that's all! We—"

Diana was on her feet and had seized him by the neck. "If you tell anyone I was crying you are a _dead_ man!" she growled.

Flash breathed a sigh of relief. As a superhero, he was used to dealing with fear, even something as frightening as Wonder Woman giving him death threats. Dealing with a woman's tears; that was something he wasn't quite ready for.

"Okay," he smiled breezily as he pulled Diana's hand off his throat. "Let's get back to _your _problem."

"Flash, before you pick a new career for me you need to keep your eyes on the prize," Diana told him. "If I'm going to take a secret identity, I need to get one that takes me to Gotham City and lets me get close to Bruce Wayne. I don't think a dancer or nightclub singer qualifies."

"Wow, you'd be smokin' hot as a nightclub singer!" Flash declared.

"Flash!"

"Flash!" the scarlet speedster cried. "A-ah! He's a miracle!" he sang.

"What?"

"Oh sorry. That comes from the Queen song that played during the old 1980 _Flash Gordon_ movie," the fastest man alive explained. "They played it in Central City at the last Flash Appreciation Day."

"Flash Appreciation Day?" Wonder Woman repeated skeptically.

"Sure, whenever too many of my archenemies get loose the mayor just holds a Flash Appreciation Day and they all show up to take me out," he smiled. "I can get a year's worth of crime fighting done in one day. How else can I spare the time to hang out _here_? I'm so fast; I can even get my _crime fighting_ done early!"

"I don't know whether to be impressed or disgusted," Diana said.

"How about jealous?" Flash smirked. "I'm so fast, I can devote a lot of time to charities and public service. Instead of just catching bad guys I'm actually making Central City a better place!"

"I'm impressed," Wonder Woman admitted.

"Hey, I might not be as smart as Batman or as strong as Superman, but I gotta be doing _something_ right to be on this team," Flash shrugged.

"Okay, I want a secret identity," Wonder Woman decided.

"Yes!" Flash cheered. "I'll get the 'Nordic blonde bimbo' outfit ready!"

"No-no-no!" Wonder Woman shuddered. "I'll take the shy librarian."

"You're sure?" Flash bargained. "Because you know you'd be totally hot as an exotic dancer."

"Flash, I want to blend in, not get arrested," Diana snorted. "Get your mind out of the gutter."

"Hm, normally I'd enlist Batman's help," Flash stroked his chin thoughtfully. "He's so good with computers that he could get you identification, a work history and a credit history in moments, but I'm guessing you want to surprise him."

"Yeah," Diana looked away and blushed.

"Okay then, let's change out of our costumes and beam back down to Earth," Flash decided.

"Where are we going?"

"Someplace more horrible than the darkest dungeons of the Legion of Doom," Flash said seriously. "We're going to the DMV."


	4. Chapter 4

Diana Prince, Secret Identity part four

_By Galaxy1001D_

In a crowded field office of the Department of Motor Vehicles in Central City, a tall statuesque amazon stood in line while trying not to lose her mind. Her icy blue eyes glowered under her large coke bottle eyeglasses. Her onyx black hair was bound in a tight unflattering bun. A shapeless cardigan sweater hid her graceful shoulders and the elegant contour of her back. She drew a deep breath, her chest straining under the flattening sports bra under the thick striped blouse she wore under the sweater. A plaid skirt that looked like a carefully folded blanket concealed her long athletic legs from view revealing only her shapely calves and dainty ankles under long black socks. Sensible shoes did everything they could not to add a single inch to her already impressive height but some things only a superhero like Plastic Man could change.

"Hey, could we pull up the slack here?" she shouted. "I look like a circus clown," she muttered to the athletic young red haired man in the red jacket, shirt and brown pants standing behind her. "My hair's being pulled so tight I think it's going to rip my scalp off!"

"I still say you need to wear the makeup," Wally West, a 'perfectly normal' citizen of Central City said with the Flash's voice.

"And when I turn into Wonder Woman, what am I supposed to do?" she whispered. "Spend ten minutes changing my makeup while people are dying? I don't know if you've noticed Flash, but during an emergency people usually need our help right _now_."

"Strange," Wally frowned. "I usually have enough time to get a sandwich when I change into costume."

"Not all of us are you," Diana hissed.

"Hey, I'm going to go to my place and get something to eat," Wally said in a normal conversational voice. "Do you want me to make you something?"

"You said you'd stand in line with me," Diana protested.

"And I will," Wally shrugged. "We're in Central City. My home's not that far away. I won't be a minute."

"Flash, do you really expect me to wait by myself while you go get a…" Diana was interrupted as yet another person opened the doors to the DMV causing a gust of wind to blow and a newspaper to blow by her face.

"…snack?" she finished as she saw Wally standing behind her eating a sandwich.

"Hey, I can be quick if I have to be," he smiled. "Want some?"

"No I don't want some!" she hissed. "Besides, haven't you read the signs? You _know_ you're not supposed to eat in…" she paused as she saw him wiping his mouth off with a napkin, the sandwich nowhere in sight. "…here," she finished weakly.

"Not a problem," he grinned before he vanished and reappeared in less time than it takes to blink. The napkin was gone, probably put into trashcan somewhere.

Diana let out a long frustrated breath. "Okay, what are we doing here again?"

"We're here to get your driver's permit," he replied.

"A permit?" she protested. "I thought I was getting a driver's _license_!"

"You are, but it takes time," Wally shrugged. "Hey, I'm the fastest man alive. How much do you think I enjoy waiting in line?"

"Why don't we just get me an Identification Card?" Diana suggested.

"Because the background check is more extensive for an ID card," Wally shrugged again.

"Let me get this straight," Diana frowned. "It's easier to get a driver's license that gives you all the benefits of an ID card, _and_ allows you to operate a motor vehicle, a machine that could be used as a getaway car or as a lethal weapon is that right?"

Another shrug. "Pretty much."

"Great Hera! I don't even _want_ to think about how long it takes to get a _gun_ in this country!" the disguised princess gasped. "How do the bad guys get their hands on them so quickly?"

Wally winced before grinning weakly at her last statement.

"Next!" said the lady behind the counter.

"What is it they don't get?" Diana snarled while gesturing at the front of the line. "That woman says 'next'. The first person goes to the window. The second person moves up to the orange line becoming the first. The third person moves up to become second and the rest of us PULL UP THE SLACK!" she bellowed the last half of her sentence while crouching and turning her strong, yet feminine hands into claws that would make Catwoman envious. "I can't take this anymore," she muttered. "Somebody has to do something."

"Hey what are you gonna do?" Wally mocked. "Get on a soapbox and make an announcement?"

"You know that's not a bad idea," Diana decided.

"Way to swallow your pride and blend in," Wally smirked sarcastically.

Diana spread her arms and announced in a loud voice. "Okay, everybody listen up and nobody gets hurt!"

Everybody but Diana and Wally hit the floor.

The next day Wally and Diana were standing in line in a DMV office in Gotham City.

"I can't believe we have to go through this all over again," Diana grumbled.

"Well it's your fault," Wally scolded. "It's just a good thing that we're both secretly superheroes. That's the only way we were able to outrun the police."

"It was so hard trying to lose them without being _too_ fast," Diana agreed. "It gave me a cramp in my legs having to run that slow."

"Tell me about it," Wally nodded. "This time you'll be a well behaved little wallflower and not act like a spoiled princess right?"

"Spoiled?" Diana snarled. "You think I was spoiled? I'll have you know that back on Themyscira we trained just as hard as the ancient Spartans, only the Spartans didn't have to worry about whether or not they had PMS!"

"Speaking of that, you seem uncharacteristically crabby and aggressive lately, is it that time of month or something?" Wally asked carefully.

"I don't follow," Diana said.

"Well you seem a little out of character," Wally scratched the back of his neck nervously. "Is it time for, you know, 'the curse'?"

"The curse?" Diana frowned in disbelief. "The curse only happens once a year."

"No, I haven't experienced it myself, but I'm pretty sure it happens once a month for most women," Wally shook his head.

"Ordinary women get the curse once a _month_?" Diana's eyes widened in horror. "Seriously? That's horrible! No wonder men have had no trouble keeping them down! You're kidding!"

Wally shook his head again. "I wouldn't dare kid about it to _you_. Once a year? Seriously? How do you know if you're late or not? I guess being an immortal amazon makes you different from most girls. The clock runs slower and all that."

Diana gulped nervously. "Could you please stop talking about it? Great Hera! Once a _month_? How can they stand it? Clark was right! The ordinary person can take more than a superhero ever could! I couldn't live like that!"

"Ew. Is there any way we can change the subject?" Wally asked.

"Yes. Please," Diana agreed. She noticed a woman standing in a line parallel to them. "I feel your pain my sister," she said with a tear in her eye as she put a sympathetic hand on the woman's shoulder.

The woman gave Diana a nervous glance before quickly looking away.

The two superheroes were quiet for a few minutes while they waited in line.

"So if it happens once a year I guess you would call it your 'yeariod," Wally joked as he broke the silence.

"Shut up Flash," Diana said as she chewed on her pencil and looked at the form secured to the clipboard in her hand. "I haven't even finished filling out my request form. Since we moved from Central City to Gotham City I've had to put in an entirely different address."

"I know, I chose the other address myself," Wally sighed. "It was perfect. The Weather Wizard wrecked the building last week so nobody would ask questions when you showed up here in Gotham City. It would simply look like you moved."

"So what address did you give me this time?" Diana asked.

"We lucked out," Wally shrugged. "Poison Ivy fumigated an entire apartment complex this week. That's why Batman hasn't been around the Watchtower lately. He's been busy. If there's one thing you can count on in this city is that there's always some maniac around burning homes down or convincing people to move."

Just then the doors opened and in walked a bunch of men staring straight ahead like zombies. All of them wore hats or headbands that held blank white cards against their foreheads. Following them was a short man with a large overbite wearing a fantastically large top hat over his blond hair. "Alice!" he smiled with a trace of a British accent. "Alice! I never would have guessed that I would find you here! Small world isn't it? But you don't have to stay in this drab, colorless world; I could take you to your own private _Wonderland_!"

"Eep!" Alice Pleasance, an attractive young blonde with a girlishly innocent face squeaked in fear.

"You just _had_ to say it, didn't you Flash?" Diana grumbled. "Who's _he_ supposed to be, Hatman?"

"No, I think he's the Mad Hatter," Wally frowned in disbelief. "Wow, and I thought _my_ villains were lame," he chuckled. "Don't worry. I got this."

"Come on!" Diana whined. "He's victimizing a _woman_! This is _my_ thing and you _know_ it!"

"You don't want to lose your place in line, do you?" Wally teased.

"No," Diana slumped and stamped her foot childishly. "Go ahead. Get this. But get back in line with me afterwards."

"Won't be three minutes," Wally said.

_Two Minutes Later_

"_That_ was easy," Wally said as he got in line in front of Diana and then allowed the disguised amazon princess to cut ahead of him.

"Yep." Diana tried to hide her mocking smile. She was standing before the orange line. The one good thing about the appearance of a costumed villain is that they can really shorten a line. People tend to leave the building when villains show up.

"Yeah, the long part was waiting for the cops from next door to arrive," Wally agreed. "Did you see the look on his face? 'How did you move so fast?'" he asked timidly as he imitated the Mad Hatter's voice. "It was priceless!" he giggled.

"Yeah, villains are stupid!" she snickered. The both shared some obnoxious laughter before getting back to the matter at hand. "Okay, I've got my mailing address and my previous mailing address filled out, but I still haven't decided on a name. What should my name be?"

"I thought we decided on 'Wendy Whoppers,'" Wally said.

"No!" Diana hissed. "That sounds like the name of a porn star!"

"Well it isn't!" Wally insisted with a guilty face. "I swear it isn't!" he lied. Then he frowned and asked her a question. "Hey. Wait a minute. How do you even know what a porn star is?"

"Believe me Flash, you do _not_ walk around in a costume like mine without everybody with an opinion telling you _exactly_ what a porn star is!" she replied through grit teeth.

"Next!" called the man at behind the counter.

"Er uh, yeah," Diana stammered as she walked up to the window. "I'm uh, not entirely finished with my request form yet."

"Go to the back of the line and let the next person come up," the man said.

Under the large coke bottle eyeglasses, Diana's beautiful blue eyes bulged in horror. "What? No! I waited in line all day _yesterday_! I can't! I can't go back to the end of the line! I got two more lines to stand in after this one! You can't send me back to the end of the line! You can't!"

"Look lady, nobody likes to wait," the man said. "You should have filled out the form before you got in line. Next!"

Wally walked up behind Diana. "Swallow your pride and use your feminine wiles," he hissed in her ear. "That's what ordinary women do."

"Feminine wiles," she nodded. "Got it!" Diana took deep breath and took her glasses off. "Please sir," she said in a husky voice as she leaned on the counter. "I _really_ need your help. I've stood in a lot of lines lately and I noticed that your line is the longest, but it runs the smoothest. The people get through your line faster than all the others. You must _really_ be the smartest guy working here."

"Yeah?" the man behind line asked nervously.

"Please there's got to be a way you can help me out," Diana continued with a sweet smile. "I just _know_ there's a heart in that hairy, _manly_ chest of yours. I know I made a few mistakes but that's because I'm…" she paused dramatically, "only a woman."

"Well," the man smiled and blushed. "I guess I can fill in the rest of the blanks for you," he said as he took her form again.

"Thank you so much," she smiled gratefully. She turned and looked at Wally who gave her the thumbs up.

"I see you haven't filled in your name," the man behind the counter said.

"Just don't say your name is Diana, princess of Themyscira," Wally warned her.

"Name?" the man behind the counter asked.

"Diana, prince…" she made a goofy face and stopped herself before she said any more. "Eeg," she grunted quietly.

"Diana Prince," the man said as he filled in the blank. "Okay, Miss Prince here's the driver's test. Fill it out and get in that line over there."

"Thank you," she smiled weakly. "That was so humiliating," she said as she and Wally walked over to the testing area. "Using my feminine wiles made my skin crawl."

"Really?" Wally smiled. "I thought it was a turn on."

"Great Hera!" Diana exclaimed. "You're not serious?"

"No," Wally groaned. "To tell you the truth it made my skin crawl too. I'm sorry Diana; I shouldn't have tried to change you. Maybe you're not cut out for it. I keep forgetting that Clark and I were born as our secret identities and that our superhero personas are the disguise. You came here as an ambassador from Themyscira. You came as yourself. What's the point of having a secret identity if you can't let your hair down and be you?"

"I'm being me all right," Diana groaned, "the part of me that I've spent my entire life suppressing. I've gone from powerful princess to barbaric buffoon. What was I thinking?"

"Yeah, I mean, '_Diana Prince_?'" Wally asked sarcastically. "Kind of on the nose isn't it? What _were_ you thinking?"

"I _was_ thinking of a _normal_ name like Eurydike!" Diana insisted.

Wally winced. "Ooh! That might be a normal name on Themyscira, but in the USA I wouldn't use any name that ended in 'dike!'"

"What's the matter with that name?" Diana asked. "_Dikē_ is the goddess of mortal justice. She's the daughter of Themis, the goddess of divine justice just like I'm the daughter of Queen Hippolyta."

"So symbolically, you're our Dikē," Wally nodded. "You fight for justice in the world of men, the world of mortals. Here in America we'd call you a _dike_."

"Yes," Diana nodded. "I'm a dike."

Wally made a funny face as he tried to stifle a laugh. When Diana frowned suspiciously it made the urge to laugh even stronger. Soon he was doubling over in laughter, causing many of the Gothamites at the DMV to cover their noses and mouths with handkerchiefs in case the Joker had released toxic laughing gas into the air again.

"_Flash_," Diana snarled through grit teeth. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing Diana! Nothing!" Wally lied between bursts of helpless laughter.

"You are _such_ a child," Diana grumbled. She didn't get the joke but she _did_ know that she had been played.


End file.
